Am I Changes Already????

Suddenly feel weird,
why I not miss all of my friends already,
where are them?
Everyday saw them at Facebook and MSN,
but why i not that happy to meet them there,
why i not curious to know more about them,
I thought I miss them so much,
but why I have no more topic to talk with them...

Inside my heart appear a little Satan,
he always control my emotion,
he make me feel hate with every body here,
make me always reject people,
make easier to feel jealous,
make me up and down every time,
make me become selfish,
make me tell lie, seriously lie...
sometime make me ignore my Heavenly Father,

I am sorry, I not that strong,
all of my plan cannot go on,
I give up to fasting because of my part time job,
I give up to continue read my bible day by day because of some unacceptable excuse,
I give up to attend church because of the feeling of boring,
I give up to share testimony to people because of I care about people mind,
I give up to write latter to the Father,
because scare people around me come and talk something to me...

Doing right always make people uncomfortable,
it is a hard way if you choose to do right thing,
people hate do right thing person,
people always thought that they are "hidung tinggi",
but actually they are not "hidung tinggi"...
They just want to do RIGHT thing....
Why cannot..........

I like vampire, no more feeling inside my heart,
where is love in this world,
everything cold cold one,
very uncomfortable...

I am sorry, i not really want to be selfish,
it is the situation force me to be selfish.
It is reality world, I no choice...

I hate you all say "sherene, very selfish"...
Father help me, I don't want to be selfish, help me kill the Satan inside my heart, I don't want up n down every time. I don't like angry until the whole heart is shaking, it is very uncomfortable, I feel suffer to have this kind of feeling. Just a small matter only, but I always feel angry until my body start shaking, until I feel I want start crying. Plaese I don't want to angry. Please I don't want...